Wedding Dress Blues

I like jeans and sweatshirts or shorts and t-shirts. I rarely go anywhere that I need to wear more. There was an upcoming wedding. Not just any wedding. I’m the Mother-of-the-Groom and will be forever more in photo albums and on Facebook. I figured that this may be the last time in my life that I have to wear a dress. I am not a shopper. What to do?

I was telling Farm Club friends the story of the dress I wore to my oldest son’s wedding seven years ago. There was an “aha” moment…I’ll do it again. Here is the story.Wedding-1986_

This is our wedding day in 1986.  We got married at the dairy where we lived and worked and I made Dan’s and Matt’s matching shirts. I don’t remember where I got the dress but it wasn’t a “wedding dress”. It was just a white dress that fit me. DSC_0196

This is Matt’s wedding many years later. I’m wearing the same dress. I dyed it and made a shawl to go with it.

When my daughter got married a few years later the wedding was to be an outdoors wedding in Vermont in the fall. Based on normal weather patterns I chose a wool dress and boots and made a chenille shawl. There was a heat wave and I probably could have used the same dress but who knew?

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My aha moment came when I realized that I could use this dress for another wedding. I like the dress and it fits me and I Don’t Have to Shop. Why not?

The wedding colors were navy blue and yellow. The bridesmaids and the Mother-of-the-Bride were all wearing navy blue. I was discussing colors with a friend and she offered to help me dye the dress with indigo. Realize that we’re about 5 weeks from the wedding date at this point. IMG_0697Dottie brought a car-load of supplies. She put indigo in a tea strainer and we watched the water turn color. We also noticed a metallic sheen on the water and weren’t sure what to do about that. We forged ahead…IMG_0701…sampling with cotton fabric that Dottie had brought with her. The metallic stuff showed up on the fabric but it seemed that we could wipe it off easily.IMG_0713So we went ahead with the dress. When dyeing with indigo you don’t want to stir up the dye bath because indigo dyeing relies on a chemical reaction as the fabric comes out of the dye and reacts with oxygen. If you introduce oxygen into the dye bath you lose some of the effectiveness of the indigo.IMG_0714When you bring something out of an indigo bath it is green at first.IMG_0719As it reacts it turns blue. Usually you rely on several dips to darken the color, but this one came out fairly dark the first time. However, we saw unevenly dyed areas where I had been too careful about lowering the dress into the bath and the dye didn’t get into the folds. There was also that metallic stuff in spots. I decided to hose the dress off (no pictures at this point) and see what it looked like. Not good. Very splotchy and not in a good way. So I tried again, this time stirring the dress in the pot with my hands.  It was more important to get an even dye job than to save the dye bath for later.IMG_0725Here is the final product. But we weren’t done. There was another step and that was a surprise to me. First though the dress had to be completely dry, so that step was going to have to wait until later.IMG_0726No, one of us didn’t grow an extra hand. Dottie came with a friend who  took some of these photos while we were working.

The next step involved a process that indigo expert, John Marshall, describes in a booklet about using soy milk when dyeing with indigo.IMG_0922

This seemed very involved and I put it off about a week but knew that I had better get moving because it was a lengthy process. Dottie had brought soaked soybeans and I had put them in the freezer. I thawed them and followed the instructions in the booklet to prepare soy milk. I put the soaked beans in the blender and added water.IMG_0921

After blending I poured the mixture into a cloth lined colander. This process is repeated three times, adding water each time to make more soy milk.

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Eventually I had a bucket with enough soy milk to cover the dress.

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This is the leftovers from the process (which, by the way, I fed to the chickens).

I soaked the dress and put it on a hanger. The dress was supposed to cure for a minimum of two to three weeks to ensure that any leftover indigo would not “crock” or come off. (Picture washing brand new jeans with white things and the dye running…or me hugging the bride and leaving streaks of blue on her dress.) Time was running out and about a week before the wedding I dunked the dress in a bucket of water with synthrapol (a detergent that is meant to attach to unfixed dye particles). Low and behold, there was very little discoloration of the water.  Dottie, you nailed it!

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The big day arrived and the dress was just fine. You can’t tell from this photo but I belted it with a silk scarf that one of my Farm Club friends dyed with our eucalyptus leaves. I chose shoes that matched the sash and when I looked back at the other wedding photos I realized that I was wearing the same shoes that I wore at Matt’s wedding!

The Main Event

The girls were beautiful, the guys were dressed (see last post), and it was time for the wedding. After enjoying sunny skies at the beginning of the week we were a bit concerned about the weather forecast. The prediction changed daily whether or not it would be partly sunny, partly cloudy, or mostly cloudy, and whether there was a 10% or 50% chance of rain, and would that rain come Friday or hold off until Saturday.IMG_1408

I don’t have photos of the actual procession or ceremony but there are plenty on Facebook now. The classic has to be when, after trying to get Flower Girl #2 (Kirby) to walk up the short aisle, Daddy carried her down the aisle spreading flowers from Kirby’s basket as he went.

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It was a beautiful ceremony with a beautiful couple. Afterwards there were all the official photos.

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Kirby was willing to be included in these…well, sort of. She was focused on picking up all the flower petals.

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My kids and their spouses.

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While the wedding party was busy with photos guests played games and used the photobooth. Dinner was served. Chris pointed out that his family sat at Tables 1 & 2 and the other 14 or so were Meryl’s family (and other friends). His point was that he was glad to become part of such a large family. But the practical aspect of that turned out to be that Tables 1 through 4 had been served dinner and then the huge dark clouds that we had been watching come in from the northwest let loose. The rain was intense and everyone made for the house, which was supposed to be for only the bridal party and not all the guests and certainly not for food. (Later the owner of the venue told us that she made an exception because of how pleasant, responsible, and easy-to-work-with our kids and their friends had all been.)

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As thunderstorms do, this one passed, leaving things wet and soggy. Chairs were wiped off and the festivities continued, albeit cold and windy. (I had loaded the car with blankets and jackets in anticipation.)

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Kirby (or her parents) had the foresight to bring appropriate clothing in case of rain.

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A little rain didn’t stop the dancing.

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Kirby took her Dad to the dance floor.

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Brothers.

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Chris’ new grandma was given a seat at the bridal party table.

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Speeches were made.

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The cake(s), made by a special friend, were cut. Chris wanted chocolate and Meryl wanted white. So there were three cakes, one with a big C and a Starwars quote (“I love you…I know”), one with a big M and a Harry Potter quote (“Always”), and a marbled cake to cut together.

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The storm had made for perfect conditions for photos…IMG_1495

…including those at sunset.

These are just a sampling of the photos that I took, but there are so many more taken by friends and family to help us remember this wonderful occasion. I’ve seen hundreds on Facebook already–isn’t the digital age wonderful when used in this way?

Wedding Day Morning

On-site preparations began the day before but there was still plenty to do on the morning of the wedding.

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No shoe polish? No problem.

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The tables were decorated.IMG_1358

The kids’ table included bubbles,and crayons.

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Pictures were hung.

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Games were arranged.

While all the preparations were being made outside…IMG_1326

…upstairs in the Bride’s Room there was a bustle of activity. Two professional hairdressers were kept busy…

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…while others did their own hair and make-up.

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Flower-girl, Tatiana, waited patiently for the time to get dressed.

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Meanwhile, downstairs, …

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…the guys didn’t seem too concerned about getting ready.

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Eventually it was time and they all cleaned up very nicely. There seemed to be some confusion about what to do with the pocket squares, but they mastered the folding technique by watching a YouTube video.IMG_1374

Inspection time for the pocket squares.

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Back upstairs, Flower Girl #1 got help with her bow.

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Flower Girl #2 skipped the morning activities, staying with Daddy and the other grandma and getting through naptime uneventfully. She showed up in time to get dressed, but took some convincing to participate.

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We gave up on the pretty white shoes with the bows in favor of the purple crocs. It was a big step for her to hold the bouquet, however temporarily.

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While the women were making their final preparations Kirby found the room set up for photo shoots. She made herself right at home there.

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Ready to go!

Getting Ready

Getting ready for a wedding. The kids worked for  for months on this…and that included having to change venues, due to no fault of their own, six weeks prior to the wedding. Then it was the day before.

IMG_1288Chris built one 8-foot and two 10-foot tables for the use of the wedding party. He also made assorted game pieces and a very cool guest sign-in board.DSC_9630Chris getting advice from his sister.DSC_9604More advice. Stout tables.DSC_9578Some of the bridal party who helped the day before. They were all there–what a great group of friends Chris and Meryl share.DSC_9610Table inspection by the resident cat…DSC_9634…who, having done his (her?) job, needed a nap.IMG_1311Wedding rehearsal. I didn’t get all the guys in the photo because I was seated in my mother-of-the-groom chair.DSC_9599The girls minus the bride.

Kirby was there also. She was a bit worried when Uncle Matt put her purple Crocs on his feet, but she recovered quickly once she got them back. Do you know how many more cute photos there are of Kirby? But I’ll restrain myself.IMG_1314Meryl’s parents hosted a dinner the night before the wedding and here are my three beautiful daughters!